You Have Your Independence, Now Let’s Find The One


Another fourth of July is officially in the books and summer is well underway. Sweltering heat, barbecues, swimming pools, beach trips, and cocktails underneath the hazy skies are all well and good. The real question is are you participating in these activities with family and friends who you know aren’t going anywhere or are you doing it with your partner-in-crime that you want to spend a potential lifetime with? You have your independence, but now let’s find the one.

Everyone loves the sunshine. You never see a grumpy sun cartoon, anywhere. Even in Who Framed Roger Rabbit the sun was smiling in ToonTown. It’s why you don’t have cabin fever during the summer. People are out and about taking trips, dining at the marina or on restaurant patios, staying out later and getting up earlier. There are even some health benefits as who what can improve by getting some natural sunshine.


Putting yourself out there is like being thrown into the pool and not being prepared to hit the water. Did you remember to hold your breath and cover your nose? Are your eyes open or closed? Are you wearing a bathing suit or regular clothes? The world of dating in this digital age requires you putting yourself out there. The problem with online dating though is people are afraid of being their authentic selves. Your dating profile gives you a facade to hide behind because sometimes we are afraid that a person might not actually like us for who we really are. What we need to understand is if that someone does not like you for you then they are not meant to be in your life long-term. Things can look great on paper; perfect job, great education…but when you go on your first Encounter date you don’t like the way they chew their food or scratch their scalp or the sound of their voice. While some of those examples are out of your control what is not out of your control is continuing¬†to put your authentic self out there and go on Encounter dates. You have to be able to differentiate¬†what it is that you want (the superficial) versus what it is that you need (the core values of a mate) in your one. Dating, dating, and more dating is the only way to find the answer to the question of “what do you need?” because you will have that one date where the qualities of the person sitting or standing across from or next to you will “click” and you will be able to give that person the largest investment you can give someone…your time.





You can’t sit back and do nothing when it comes to your dating life. You have to be pro-active. You have to go on dates. The primary focus of every major platform out there today is that when it comes to dating they do nothing. Chatting and messaging is another facade to hide behind in order to avoid getting to know the real person. Anyone can be whomever they choose to be behind a text. People are falling for the profile and not the person behind the profile. Encounter prioritizes the dating in online dating. Setup your profile and go out on real dates with real people. Don’t be the person doing nothing. Take control of your dating life so you can find your one.

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